Description: Here are problems in the Cambridge ESOL Teaching Awards Complaint Form, dated July 2007. Quoted text is in red.
"When Cambridge ESOL receives the signed complaint form, we will forward it to the centre, who will be asked to provide a formal response to the issues you have raised."
- While a center has people in it, it is not a person. Accordingly, "who" is the wrong pronoun.
"Cambridge ESOL will advise you and the centre on the outcome of your complaint usually within twelve weeks of the receipt of the completed complaint form. However please be advised that some complaints may take longer to investigate."
- "[O]n" is the wrong preposition. It is not "on the outcome." It is "of the outcome."
- There should be a comma before "usually."
- There should be a comma after "However."
"For all complaints, Cambridge ESOL undertakes to keep centres and candidates informed of progress."
- This is poorly written. "[U]ndertakes" is not the appropriate word here. You might want to use "endeavors."
- Placing the modifier at the beginning of the sentence is awkward.
- "[P]rogress" is vague and not clearly defined.
"It is not possible to investigate spoken comments that were made or incidents that took place during the course where there is no record of them"
- There is no period at the end of this sentence.
- "[W]here" indicates a location. Since you are talking about an absence of a record, I would suggest using "in the event that" instead of "where."
"I understand and agree that as part of the complaints procedure, my complaint, my portfolio and other relevant documents and correspondence will be looked at by the independent complaints investigator…."
- There should be a comma after "portfolio."
- I would suggest using "examined" instead of "looked at."
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